More sites a mother could love.
Due to unprecedented demand - OK, six e-mails and a call from my mother might not impress Bill McClellan or Jerry Berger but for me it's an outpouring of public response - I've decided to see if I can milk this "Get Mom on the Internet" thing for another column.
If you missed last week's effort, go to your room and don't come out until you've read the whole thing and are ready to apologize. The rest of you will recall that I challenged readers to send me compelling reasons for getting my mother, and everyone else's, online. Remember, I warned you Mom is:
- Busy.
- Not easily impressed.
- And a lot closer to June Cleaver than Captain Janeway of the starship Voyager.
Aside from some gentle chiding about my stereotypical portrayal of Mom, the responses I got were unanimously friendly and helpful. Apparently, your mothers raised you right.
Deane Cole fell into the trap of thinking that because Mom can do something online, she'll want to. Her suggestion that The Weather Channel radar maps might be of interest before sending the children off to school overlooks the fact that Mom is used to gathering the same information by opening the front door and looking at the sky. I was more impressed with her recommendation that Mom might like online banking. Mom views the local ATM machine as a member of the family, so she might be willing to adopt an online banking program. Still I suspect it will be a few years before she trades her hard cash in for virtual currency.
Lori from AOL is a self professed "addicted mom" who maintains a flirtatious e-mail relationship with her husband while he's at work. Now there's an idea. If Mom can convince Dad to get a job - I hear McDonald's is hiring retirees - we might be on to something.
Merrilyn Parham, who admits she isn't yet completely comfortable online, sent along a quiz to determine if Mom has mastered enough modern technology to log on. It's a good idea but I have to quibble with a couple of her questions. Sorry, but if you make VCR programming a criteria for getting online you're dooming 99% of the population - including me - to a life offline. And I'm not sure I understand the question "Does Mom wear panty hose?" Plenty of women online still wear garter belts and stockings. Of course you have to be eighteen or older to visit their Web sites. Otherwise, thanks for the help Merrilyn. And, by the way, if the Parham boy happens to be reading this, your mother would appreciate it if you would log off and PHONE home.
Mom likes to get around, so the suggestion from another online mom to monitor the British Airways site for travel bargains will appeal to her. Although I have to admit, I have enough trouble keeping up with her the way it is.
And finally Sharon Fiely sent along enough sites to fill two of these columns. I appreciate the effort, just don't get any ideas about taking over my job. One of her favorite sites belongs to high-tech sewing machine manufacturer Bernina of America. If Captain Janeway does her own mending, she probably uses a Bernina. I guess if moms can master these machines they'll have no trouble unlocking the mysteries of HTML.
Sharon also suggests stopping by Eleanor Burns' Quilt in a Day site to pick up a free quick pattern for a baby quilt. And, if Mom has more on her mind than Web surfing and sewing, she can check out Beatrice's Web Guide for information on the arts, parenting, careers and much more.
She concludes with the following motherly advice, "James, there is a wealth of information waiting out there for Mom. Put your mom online for Mother's Day! She just might show you a thing or two..."
Unfortunately, now that you readers have gotten her interested in the Web, that's exactly what I'm worried about. That and the fact that she's begun to say "prepare to energize" every time she starts the car.
